I’ve been thinking about what to do or say to my friends who’ve lost their loved ones. There must be something I can say or do to make things better for them. My heart aches to watch my friends go through such sadness and knowing that probably the only thing that might ease things is time. Unfortunately, time moves in slow motion during a tragedy.

Today, the funeral is over, the memorial is done and the gathering of remembering and praising is over between friends and colleagues. You find yourself standing all alone among his things, his smell and his loving presence everywhere you look. You find yourself feeling empty, hollow and incredibly lost. I know this because I have lost friends who were so dear to my heart.

I couldn’t believe the world was still going around me. The sun still rises and the sun still goes down. People are going places, making plans and having dinners…it’s like no one notices that you’ve lost your husband, your best friend. But that is how this world is; the world still goes around and round.

I know you want to be strong and keep up the brave front. In truth, you just want to scream to anybody you see that you’ve just lost the love of your life! Your life is NO LONGER THE SAME! You want the whole world to feel the same loss and pain. But you stop and realize that no one really hears you. To the world now, he was here one day and now he is gone. Gone forever. It didn’t happen to them today, this just happened to YOU, today. You realize this is your life today. This horrible, sad, unbelievable empty moment is all yours to hold and feel, now. It really starts to sink in, day after day, week after week. Now, you are going to bed alone, walking alone, eating alone. You are alone and finally it sinks in that he is not coming back. This is final.

My dearest, dearest friend, you know that life throws so many things at you and is a journey. These sad, unthinkable events make us stronger and help us mature. I would like for you to try to think of this as a new experience in your journey. God willing, you will never have to go through these losses. I guess it is only natural to lose your parents, or even family members — but not your lover, best friend and soul mate so soon.

Honey, do you remember when you first fell in love? How you felt? What incredible highs and lows you’ve experienced? If you were lucky enough to have truly felt love, you know how beautiful, how sad and how hurtful it can be. Feel this bittersweet pain, feel your heart rip apart, cry hard until you pass out, sing your favorite songs, scream or laugh like a crazy person, drink like a lost soul and taste the salt of your tears … the stage is all yours. Act it out like a star in a play. You’ve lived a love story that ended tragically, and it’s time to start another chapter. Our journey never ends until you can no longer breathe.

You have to know that your love was so pure and honest. You felt it, you smelled it, you lived it and you had it! Most people walk through life without knowing the meaning of love. Do you know how beautiful and how lucky you are? This is the saddest journey, but it is the journey that you will write. It will either be a brave, melancholy and beautiful story, or it will be devastating and dark without lights. Either way, there is no right or wrong way to mourn.

You know who you are; you are already writing it already. It is beautiful as it should be…whenever you get that down feeling, act it out or laugh! Laughter is a blessing, laughter puts oxygen in your heart and is a natural relief. We don’t do it enough. Some of us forgot how to laugh during our journeys.

Life is not cheap. Life expects a lot! We all pay for it with our trials and tribulations while living through all these obstacles and joy!

These are the feelings that the greatest love stories are written from, movies are made from and songs are born from. It’s an epic tale and you are at the start. You are that beautiful heroine in love, missing the love of your life, devastated and helpless. Love stories are so beautiful in the movies because they are truly beautiful in real life. This is YOU today! How many of us REALLY fall in love in one lifetime? How many of us truly find a soulmate in one lifetime? YOU DID! Feel all these beautiful God-given emotions that we are supposed to have as human beings. Take it all in, act it out, let your heart fill with such feeling that you’ve never felt before. Only a woman in love can feel these feelings.

Watching you go through this is excruciatingly painful and sad for your friends, but we are not able to feel all the things that you feel at any given moment. This is your journey to experience the beautiful memories and cherish the love you both have shared — and also to feel what it is like to have loved. All we can do is allow for you to let us love you and comfort you whenever you need. We are always there for you on the sidelines. I know you know that.

In my lifetime, I lost an unborn child, I lost my grandmother, I lost my best friends and I lost my best mentor. Each time the journey was different. With my baby, I found closure in a painting, now he is in the frame, forever a fixture in my life. With my grandmother, I accepted her death with the Buddhist’s way because that’s the way she wanted it. With my best friends, I wrote down their beliefs and memorized the wisdom that they left me. How they’ve made such a difference in my journey. Appreciating their unconditional love to me, how I will always miss talking to them and hearing their birthday wishes for me, feeling the warm comfort of the friendship…How I wish I could steal another kiss, another hug, another moment holding hands together…I think everyday about how you are doing with such a loss. Sometimes I think it’s easier if we all go together. No one needs to go through this pain.

My dearest friend, at the end of the day, we are all human beings with so many emotions. It is a curse and a blessing. Life is what you want your life to be. You are in a journey. You will decide your day when you face the world tomorrow, again and again. You are a beautiful, talented and an amazing human being! You have a whole different world and experiences ahead of you. You just need to grab it and make it your own! You will get there soon. And remember always that we will be there for you.

Your friend,

Tiffani Kim Griffith

After reading through a few popular diet/health books such as “The Dukan Diet” and “The 4-Hour Body” by Timothy Ferriss, I came up with an idea to create healthy egg white, non-dairy, loaded-with-protein breakfast squares. I can make a whole pan of squares at once, put them in individual zip-lock bags, and eat them like a protein bar in the morning—except it’s tastier and more satisfactory than having a protein bar.

This easy recipe is great for either breakfast or lunch. You can just reheat in the microwave or eat it cold. This recipe is also great for using up leftovers!

Ingredients

• 1-1/2 cups of Canadian bacon

• 1/4 cup diced onion

• Two dozen egg whites

• 1 cup any kind of vegetables

• 1 can of black beans

• 1 can of lentils

• Pepper to taste (Salt is not necessary; the Canadian bacon has enough salt)

• Fresh basil and parsley, or any other fresh herbs you desire

• Fresh garlic or garlic powder

Directions

• Preheat an oven to 300 degrees F.

• Cook the Canadian bacon, onion and fresh garlic or garlic powder in a skillet over medium heat until the Canadian bacon has browned (about 10 minutes).

• Spray a baking pan with olive oil spray.

• Whisk together the eggs and pepper. Sprinkle the Canadian bacon with other vegetables and beans in the baking pan, then pour the egg mixture over the top.

• Bake in the preheated oven until a knife inserted into the center comes out clean (about 30 to 45 minutes depending on what kind of vegetables you add to the mix). The black beans and lentils sink to the bottom of the pan, so it keeps the form solid.

• Cut into wedges to serve; or after it is cooled, cut them in squares and put them in individual zip-lock bags in the refrigerator.

Enjoy and bon appétit!

Servings Per Recipe: 6

Image: sundayhill / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

The dramatic shift from the deep freeze of winter into the drama and glory of spring is an incredible thing to behold. If it weren’t for spring, many of us Chicagoans would be somewhere else sitting under a palm tree sipping a cool drink and slapping on the sunscreen.

In Chinese medicine, the season of spring is aptly associated with the elemental energy of wood. While many people think of wood as the hardwood logs that you throw on the fire, those tender green shoots poking out of the ground are also elemental wood.

The wood element and spring also relate to the Chinese organ system of the Liver. Responsible for the free flow of everything in your body, your Liver is prone to blockages–both physical and emotional. In fact, when you’re deeply frustrated or angry, your Chinese Liver is compromised; basically things aren’t moving as smoothly as they should. (Same goes for menstrual cramps, digestive problems, some headaches, and constipation–it’s all about flow.)

So, in honor of spring and all manner of couch spuds heading outdoors, here aremy top ten ways to be a little healthier this spring:

1) Eat more sprouts, shoots, and greens. Remember, those baby plants are chlorophyll-rich manifestations of the wood element. And they’re really good for you.
2) Start a garden. Whether you grow some lettuce in pots on your balcony or convert part of your back yard into a pumpkin patch, gardening is good for your soul. In addition, it can be a cost-effective way to get pesticide-free produce on your table this spring and summer.
3) Get your eyes checked. While this may seem unrelated to anything, your Chinese Liver is actually responsible for the health of your eyes. So take care of them this spring by getting your vision checked.
4) Commit to being a little more flexible. Wood is healthy when it’s strong, yet bendable. Inflexible wood will quickly break when it’s stressed. Likewise, flexible people are better able to handle stress and take life’s bumps and bruises in stride. If you struggle to deal what life dishes out, give a little, like branches in the breeze.
5) Get moving. Spring, the wood element, and your Liver are all about flow and movement. Get off the couch and get the sap going in your veins. Take a walk, play outside, ride your bike. Whatever you do, a little movement will wake you up and make you feel good.
6) Go outside. Get in touch with the natural world around you. Be a witness to the incredible changes this season brings. Much of Chinese medicine is based on the cycles of nature, and those cycles are most apparent in the spring.
7) Take care of your Liver. Um…how? Eat foods that closely resemble their original state. (E.g. eat raspberries, not a raspberry-filled jelly doughnut.) Take a little break from adult beverages. Skip highly processed foods and foods with very long ingredient lists. It will feel like a mini detox.
Stretch. The Chinese Liver also governs the health of your tendons and ligaments. Avoid injury while you’re performing Item #5 above by stretching a little. Massage is also a good way to get the circulation going in your muscles, ligaments, and tendons.
9) Eat darkly colored foods to enrich Liver blood. Black beans, eggplant, greens, blueberries, spinach, peppers, beets, etc. You get the picture.
10) Start something new. Spring is a time of growth and expansiveness. By starting a new project, hobby, skill, job or relationship, you’re creating movement, change, and growth that are the essence of this time of year.

That’s why we at the Tiffani Kim Institute are hosting the first-ever “Fertility Boot Camp for Couples” on Saturday, Feb. 26. Just as we held three all-female “Fertility Boot Camp” sessions last year, we’re taking the same day-long format and adapting it so that attendees will learn what they can do as a couple to optimize their chances of conception–and carry that little bundle of joy to term.

As female participants have learned in THEIR Fertility Boot Camp sessions, couples will pick up helpful information about enhancing both male and female fertility, using the latest knowledge in nutrition, acupuncture, and other techniques that make a difference when it comes to conceiving. Between 9 a.m. and 4 p.m., they’ll take part in a variety of activities, from meditation to cooking demonstrations, from mind/body connection exercises to relationship-building.

Why COUPLES this time? “It was the request that we had from our previous participants,” says Jeanie Bussell, the director of Acupuncture and Oriental Medicine at TKI who leads guests during the “Boot Camp” sessions, as we take an integrated Eastern and Western approach to health and wellness. “It’s about, ‘How can they bring in their spouses and involve them in their overall fertility issues.’ It’s a ‘both’ journey of male and female.” After all, women can’t get pregnant on their own!Says Jeanie: “A lot of times it’s women who take the responsibility for making the appointments” and searching for fertility solutions, “but about 40 percent (of infertility) is due to male factors.” That’s why this month’s Boot Camp will address male fertility issues, and we’re hoping to have both a urologist and a male OB-GYN doctor take part.

As with the other “Fertility Boot Camp” sessions, this one will be small and intimate, limited to no more than 12 couples. When people are facing conception challenges, they can feel alone in their struggles–but the Feb. 26 session will allow them to interact with other couples in the same situation. “It gets so stressful going to all these appointments, trying to get pregnant,” says Jeanie. The couples’ Boot Camp session “just offers a really nice way for men to get involved and for couples to spend the day together. I think it’s going to be a really informative process for the guys. If nothing else, they can do it for their wife and the future baby.”

Another bonus: every couple at this month’s Fertility Boot Camp will receive a complimentary consultation with Reproductive Endocrinologist Dr. Eve Feinberg, a session they can schedule for after Feb. 26’s Boot Camp. (She’ll also speak during the day.)

Fertility Boot Camp is $220 per couple, and includes a “fertility-friendly lunch” (which means they’ll be wheat-free, gluten-free and almost dairy-free) and snacks during the seven-hour session. It’ll be held at the Tiffani Kim Institute, 310 W. Superior St.

Want to sign up or get more information? Give TKI a call at (312) 260-9020 or click here for more information. Remember, there’s nothing like taking this process into your own hands and doing all you can to empower yourselves!

Well, in THIS case, the “mask” that might save your sanity is a stress-relieving massage.

Many people think of massages as merely luxuries, or indulgences someone gives you as a gift. But really, massages are great ways to relieve the crazy amounts of stress we face during the winter holiday season. I love talking to Madi Camilo, Massage Department manager here at the Tiffani Kim Institute, because she always reminds me–and the rest of us at TKI–just whymassages during this time of year are so wonderful.

“The cold just brings out a whole lot more drama,” Madi says, “and we’re here to help deal with that stress. One thing we really focus on are customized massages.” If you don’t have a full 60 minutes or more, Madi and her team will do “target massages” for 30 minutes ($50), which allow therapists to focus on whatever body parttroubles you most. “I love that ‘on-the-go, I’m-trying-to-relieve-stress’ massage,” she says.

If it’s true overall tension relief you’re after, Madi recommends the “Serenity Stone” massage where smooth stones are warmed to 135 degrees and used as tools in a Swedish-style massage. The “Therapeutic Stone” version is more intense for a more rehabilitative effect. A”Deep Tissue Massage” is great for anyone who deals with chronic tension (sounds like MOST of us!), while the “Aromatherapy” version adds essential oils to the mix for therapeutic benefit.

No matter what your issue, a good therapist will ask questions first and then suggest a massage treatment that’s good for what ails you.

And while massages certainly feel great,many also bring with them real health benefits. Among them, says Madi: “Improved circulation. We’re actually stimulating the (body’s) nerve receptors to wake up. We’re promoting all-over clarity. Massage also stimulates the lymph nodes and helps drain extra fluid from the limbs.”

With benefits like these, it’s a wonder more of us don’t take advantage of these stress relievers more often. I, for one, plan to do it MUCH more often during the holidays and into the New Year.

But we ALL can benefit from knowing how to better handle the stress that finds its way into our lives. That’s why the Tiffani Kim Institute Medical Wellness Spa is hosting a FREE seminar from 5-6 p.m. on Thursday, Nov. 18, at the Institute, 310 W. Superior (between Franklin and Orleans).

For many people, whether they find themselves with plenty of money or never enough, finances are a MAJOR stress factor. That’s why Thursday’s seminar will focus on “Identifying and Managing Financial Stress.” Led by Dr. Dominic Gaziano, who practices Integrative Internal Medicine at our River North facility, the hour-long seminar will share how stress in general affects our overall health, addressing the “six spheres” of stress we face in daily life.

Then, Gisella Tomasio, a Chartered Retirement Advisor and financial planner, will take it a step further and discuss financial basics. (After all, often our money-related stress comes from what we don’t know or understand!) And in true Tiffani Kim Institute style, we will wrap things up with a Meditation session led by our own fabulous Caroline Jung, a board-certified acupuncturist.

At the Institute, much of what we offer–from our pampering, leave-the-world-behind spa services to acupuncture to Integrative Internal Medicine services–is designed to counteract the effects of stress on people’s minds and bodies. That’s why I wanted to offer this seminar–and to hold it in our “Place of Peace” room. It’s a beautiful, serene space designed to calm people’s minds and bodies. SURELY we can all use more of those!

Have questions or want more information? Just give us a call at 312-260-9020.

There’s a reason why for thousands of years, Chinese and other Asian medicine practices have treated people for conditions BEFORE they got them sick. Way back then, acupuncturists knew the value of prevention, helping keep ailments and diseases from taking root in people’s bodies.

But as I know from talking to clients at the Tiffani Kim Institute, not everyone’s convinced. I understand–an ancient technique that involves being stuck with sharp pointy objects (even though the needles are hair-thin!) probably sounds unbelievable. That is, until you try it.

So to make it easier for skeptics to give this treatment a try, TKI is offering a special deal on acupuncture services through Oct. 31. But no Halloween trick here: Take $40 off your first acupuncture consultation and treatment. Save 10 percent on a package of five treatments; 20 percent off a package of 10. I’ll admit I’m biased, but our team of acupuncturists is out of this world. Not only are they well-trained and passionate about their work, but they are truly some of the most patient people I know.

Personally, I’m a huge believer in acupuncture and how it helps re-balance the flow of Qi (pronounced “chee), or “vital energy,” in the body. When Qi flows in harmony, the body is in a state of good health. When it ISN’T, the Qi flow can become obstructed, everything out of whack. Using those needles, a trained acupuncturist inserts needles at specific points along the body’s energy pathways, which are called meridians. The needles stimulate specific areas on the body associated with “out-of-balance” organ functions to bring back balance and help the body maintain good health.

So whether you’ve got chronic conditions like arthritis, fibromyalgia, or various auto-immune diseases, acupuncture just might be a good complement to your traditional medical regimen. After all, a technique that’s thrived for thousands of years–and that people still find credible in the know-everything 21st century–just might be worth checking out!

Dancing With the Stars: Margaret Cho

Ok, Margaret Cho: I felt bad that you had to leave — although I didn’t think you would last that long.  You should have known you were not going to win against Bristol Palin.  The money-hungry TV execs are going to make sure that Bristol stays in for the ratings.  In addition, you displayed too much vulnerability and insecurity about yourself and your sexual identity. Contrast that with Bristol Palin, who doesn’t even know that she’s being mocked while on the show.  When I saw the first show where they had her dress in Sarah Palin’s so-called “conservative suit” — then stripped it off to unveil her sad self, it was so painful to see how TV exploited her naivete and love for a few minutes of her fame at the price of her mother and family.

But back to you Margaret: First of all, you are NOT a bad looking woman; secondly, you know that you are not a good dancer.  It is only fair that you should be gone, but Bristol should’ve been gone before you.  You know how screwed up this world is — just watch the other reality shows.  They exploit the lower to middle class of the population for seconds of fame before they get buried again in lifelong sorrow.  This is the world we live in.  Get over the sorrow and live your life.  At least you have a good job.  Do what you know how to do best, be gay and be happy.

While we all know that fertility challenges are serious (and believe me, I know from personal experience), we at the Tiffani Kim Institute are again hosting what we playfully call “Fertility Boot Camp: Whip Your EGGS Into Shape!” on Saturday, Oct. 2. We hope that during this 9 a.m.-6 p.m. holistic retreat, women will learn what they need to know–and do–in order to boost their fertility and the possibility of getting pregnant and carrying to term.

The Boot Camp is purposely designed to be a small and intimate setting, with between 15 and 20 participants. Jeanie Lee Bussell, L.Ac. Dipl. OM., MSOM, is one of our wonderful staff acupuncturists and one of the Midwest’s top specialists in the treatment of infertility–and she leads our guests during the Boot Camp session! At our past two sessions, women from their late 20s to mid-40s have attended. Some are engaged and newly married; others have been coupled for awhile.

“It’s not only for people who are trying to conceive,” says Jeanie, “but for people want to preserve their fertility and are thinking of having children.”

Fertility issues can play a big role in a woman’s (and her partner’s) emotional and spiritual well-being, so “Fertility Boot Camp” takes a holistic approach to reproductive issues. We discuss everything from nutrition (”healing foods” and a “fertility-friendly” diet) to fitness to Reproductive Endocrinology. And we also incorporate yoga, meditation and other activities that help get women’s bodies, minds and spirits in shape for optimal fertility.

As many of you know, I am very passionate about the link between traditional Eastern and Oriental and Western medicine. It’s why the Tiffani Kim Institute takes an integrated approach to health and wellness–and why I insisted that Fertility Boot Camp do the same.

“I think that having that integration can work both ways,” says Jeanie, “whether you’re trying to conceive naturally or through assisted methods. The Boot Camp is a complement to whatever (couples) are already doing. That integration of East and West is like a yin/yang pair.”

But after the daylong Boot Camp is over, there’s still work to do. Each participant takes home a workbook full of exercises, recipes, and helpful reminders of what she learned that day. Eventually, Jeanie would like to organize a group of previous Boot Camp participants so they can keep in touch–and keep encouraging each other, as we women like to do.

And speaking of encouragement: We held the first Fertility Boot Camp last November, and one of our participants is about to give birth to a child! Several other “Boot Camp” women also have conceived since attending. As Jeanie says, we certainly can’t promise that you’ll get pregnant, but “in a way, it created a lot of awareness for them.

Think you–or someone who know who’s trying to conceive–might like to learn more? Visit our website or give us a call at 312.260.9020.

We’re all used to seeing TV commercials for those drugstore-purchased teeth whitening strips that claim they’ll brighten your smile for less than 40 bucks. Sounds too good to be true, doesn’t it? Of course! But who do you know that doesn’t want a gorgeous smile?

Some people get lucky in the gene pool and inherit great teeth. Others manage to avoid staining their pearly whites with caffeine, cola drinks, red wine and similar offenders and maintain bright smiles their whole lives. But many women find that going the “teeth whitening” route gives them the look they’ve always wanted. It’s still them, only better. I don’t think it’s vanity—anything that makes you feel better about yourself and more confident is a good thing.

All these years after teeth whitening products showed up on TV, many people still have questions about the process. Is it safe? Will it weaken my teeth? Is it ridiculously expensive?

I go to a FABULOUS dentist, one who has a wonderfully calming touch when it comes to dealing with other people’s teeth. So I asked Dr. Marty Marcus, DDS, of University Associates in Dentistry and the Dental Implant Institute of Chicago, some questions about tooth whitening and brightening. And since he’s one of the official dentists of our Stanley Cup-holding Chicago Blackhawks, you can trust he knows what he’s talking about!

Is teeth whitening a dental-improvement product or a “beauty product?”

“It’s as much a beauty product as a dental product—and more so a beauty product, if you ask me. There is no tooth benefit to tooth whitening, but it’s perfectly fine. People think it removes tooth structure, but it’s actually an oxidation process. You’ve seen this in TV detergent commercials: you’re bonding oxygen to remove the staining or discoloration from the teeth.”

Why do you find that most patients want their teeth whitened in the first place?

“A lot of people want to look better. There’s a self-esteem issue. And people’s teeth are brighter now. In our cosmetic world, what used to be considered bright 15 years ago is nowhere near as what’s bright now. And saying ‘I bleached my teeth’ is totally acceptable now.

“Studies show a smile is one of the main things people notice about someone’s appearance. Whitening is just a way to make yourself as attractive as possible. It just augments the rest of your beauty, whereas if you didn’t have it done, it might detract from it.”

Do you find that more clients ask for teeth whitening when the weather gets warm?

“People are ready for change. I think people are hibernating in the winter, but come springtime, there are more weddings and social occasions where people think about (their teeth).”

What should a patient keep in mind if she decides to pursue teeth whitening? And how much can it cost?

“When you get your hair cut, it’s not going to stay that way forever. It’s the same thing with teeth whitening. You can periodically boost it—if you’re going to a wedding you can do it in a night or two or three and get some brightening.

“If you are going to need to augment things anyway, why not just use the trays? The molds are made specifically for you. You can use a variety of bleaching materials that are time-tested. You can wear the trays overnight, for a couple of hours, for seven to 10 days at a time.

“I use the KöR Whitening Deep Bleaching System, which offers in-office pre-conditioning and boosting. Other products include Discus and Opalescence.
Prices can range from $295 to $1,250, depending on the system used and the amount of work you need.

“Cost is one issue. The other is, ‘How will the patient be able to use the product? Busy people may only be able to use them overnight; others can wear them for a couple of hours at night when they watch TV.”

Even though the procedure is safe, are there still some potential issues patients face?

“The problems we have had in the past are two-fold: Sensitivity to the products as well as to the strength and particular (whitening) material of choice. There are desensitizing agents people can use on their teeth before and after, such as Sensodyne toothpaste.”

What are some of the misconceptions you have to clear up when a patient comes to you for tooth whitening?

“It will brighten your teeth; it will not WHITEN your teeth. Heredity, tooth structure, the reason your teeth are stained (sometimes, tetracycline can darken them). Companies have come out with different shading charts. I look at it as, ‘You can brighten your teeth and they can get lighter, but you can (only) brighten your teeth in the realm of what your teeth can get.’ I like more of a natural look than a fake look. Porcelain veneers are what you have to get into if you really want white teeth.

“The other thing people have to know is if they have caps or crowns or any restorative material on their teeth, they probably will have to be changed after getting the brightening.”

If you need to have dental work done—such as cavities filled—can you still get your teeth whitened?

“You can do tooth whitening first and then get whatever dental work done to match. The whitening of your teeth allows you to maintain the shape and structure of your (own) teeth rather than using caps or crowns.”

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