How does anyone lose someone they love so much and live? I have lost my best friend in the whole wide world. Her name was Sharon Sharp.

In situations like this, most people reflect and talk about how losing a loved one was so devastating for them — but Sharon wouldn’t have wanted that, and I don’t want that either. I just want to talk about Sharon as my friend, how she inspired me, how she loved me, and how she made a huge difference in so many people’s lives in such a wonderful and positive way.

Brad and I met Don and Sharon on the day of our wedding 23 years ago. We were pulling into our apartment building, right after we got married. We saw the most handsome couple in the front of the building. We started to talk to them, and it was an instant friendship on the first sight! Sharon was the Illinois Lottery Director and Don owned an insurance company. Upon seeing them for the first time, I remember telling Brad, “When we grow up, I want us to be just like them.” (When I later told Sharon that story, she jokingly retorted, “You, Bitch”!)

Sharon was the perfect example of a true “girl-friendship.” She gave me unconditional love, honest friendship, and made me feel so safe. Sharon’s friendship gave me confidence and happiness. She was always proud of what I have accomplished. If I happened to receive an award, or cook something that was fabulous, she would always brag about me — and not just me, but all of her other girlfriends, too. Sharon had a lot of strong, high-powered girlfriends because she was never jealous of them. She always supported, respected and loved them for what they accomplished, and proud of the fact that she was their friend.

Sharon was part of a family I chose to have in my life. She accepted me just the way I was, and we were so happy being around each other. We’ve gone through good, bad and ugly times, and we were always there for each other. We never had to ask for help; we just knew what we needed to do for each other and just did it. We embraced the same principles of right and wrong and about how to live a good, descent life.

Sharon taught me what to do in life. She was always right on. Sharon was a very, very smart and intelligent woman. She was very mature and sophisticated in her thoughts. Even though she was 20 years older than me, she remained modern in both her viewpoints and lifestyle. We always agreed on issues of right or wrong — for us, it was that clear. I think that’s where our friendship started: We had the same morals and ethics, which is a solid base for any kind of relationship. We grew up learning right and wrong from our parents, who preached and lived righteous lives.

Sharon was also very capable and knew how to handle difficult situations (and people). When Sharon, Brad, Don and I would go to a party, if there was a crass person no one wanted to deal with, we would always stick Sharon or Brad with that person, and the evening would be just peaceful and happy. Both Brad and Sharon found interest in everyone, and even the most loutish of people understood and appreciated their generosity and patience.

We loved to cook. We enjoyed trying new recipes on each other as guinea pigs. We didn’t mind because we trusted each other’s abilities and taste. We loved cooking for each other on Sundays: It was our evening together, and after watching 60 Minutes, we’d talk about our weekend and the week ahead. Yes, we gossiped … but we trusted each other that whatever we talked about stayed at the dinner table, and it did! It was good to have someone who you can gossip to, and know that it will never be repeated. We never judged others, we just accepted them — but at times, we decided to thank God that we were not like them.

Sharon loved Ilana and Dick, and we spent many of those Sunday dinners together. One very special Sunday evening, Rebecca brought Ray Charles to dinner; Ray was working with Rebecca on a project for the Georgia Lottery. Sharon invited her favorite friends. Ray bonded with Rebecca, Don and Sharon instantly when Sharon cooked Ray’s favorite, collard greens and biscuits. Ray absolutely loved it and had several servings. Ray drank his Crystal Champagne, played his songs and serenaded all the girls. It was a moment we would never forget. He made all of us girls feel so special! He was an incredible human being!!!

We loved our glass of red wine at the end of the day. When I had a bad day or a good day at work, I would usually get home, call Sharon, go down and have a glass of wine with her, and chill while talking about the day. Her door was always open, like a wine bar that never closed — but with no charge and with a great bartender named Sharon. Usually, there was always someone else there before me or after me. Sharon’s door was always open for her friends and dogs. Sharon always cooked more than normal people. Pat was always there, always busy doing big events but always popped in for a glass of red in between her events. Terry, Sharon and Princess were there, Kip’s friends were always there, as well as Kim, Kathy, Christine, Delilah, Lynn, Dorothy, Ann…

When I think back, I don’t know how Sharon did it, but evenings like that proved to be just so comfortable to hang out with her. It was always a place you could pop in and never feel like you were infringing on her privacy. That was her talent. She mixed people from all different walks of life and ages, but she made everybody feel comfortable and welcome. She loved that her friends always became friends. For instance, Sharon introduced me to my dearest friend Sherren in Michigan. She thought that because we had houses in Michigan, we should get to know each other. She was right! I loved hearing their China story when they were traveling with Governor Thompson. So many memorable and unforgettable stories that I love hearing over and over again; Sherren and I can still talk about them and laugh again.

Sharon, Ilana and I loved fashion and beauty. In fact, Sharon and Ilana had so many funny stories about their shopping extravaganzas! We were all proud of the fact that it is fun to shop retail, but it is more fun finding great bargains. Of course, we always bought more when it was cheaper, but we loved giving to others so it always worked out. Sharon was the most beautiful woman I have ever met. Inside and out. My sister Jacky called her more beautiful than Sharon Stone — and she was. She didn’t need to try to look good at all; she just looked good in anything she threw on together. Her eyes were so big and blue and crystal clear. Her hair was blonde, then it turned silver gray as she got older — the color that most women would want when their hair started to turn gray. She kept it short and chic. She never gained weight. She was a perfect height of 5′7″ and size 4-6. She was always a perfect model for my clothes. I was always proud when she wore my designs, she certainly made my dresses come to a life! She wore my silver strap dress when Kip and Erin got married. She was the most beautiful mother of the groom! She was so happy!!! We were so happy!!!!

Entertaining was one of Sharon’s favorite things to do. Sharon and I loved to entertain and be with friends. To Sharon, more the merrier! We enjoyed entertaining descent human beings who believed in treating other people like the way we wanted to be treated. We didn’t like mean, nasty people (and we always agreed on who they were.) We didn’t like people who were nasty to less fortunate or less educated people. When we went out, we always enjoyed meeting nice and interesting people. We didn’t discriminate. We would always be the last ones to leave each other’s parties so we could talk about how successful the party was. We’d always agree that our party was a success! Of course, we would immediately agree that parties are too much work, and that we would never put together another one ever again. Fortunately, that sentiment never lasted. We loved entertaining, feeding our friends and bringing them together.

We loved our family. We were both devoted to giving anything our families needed. Sharon loved Kip and Laura! Then there were Erin and the grand kids, they were her pride and joy! Sharon and Laura made their holiday trips to Colorado to visit the kids, and it was always one of those things she looked forward to.

We loved our town of Chicago, Lake Michigan, Lake Shore Drive, our apartments, our doorman and staff. We cared for them like a family.

Sharon loved politics. I loved hearing her point of view on it, because it was always very colorful and she helped me understand what it is about politics that some people are so nuts about. She loved her political group. A lot of very powerful, opinionated women with lots to say about what they believed in. Sharon was always excited about their round table discussion of everybody’s opinions and topics.

We loved our dogs and animals. Sharon spoiled her dogs and my dog Monster 1^St, 2^Nd and 3^Rd. We both thought that any humans who treated animals badly were the lowest form of life on this planet. We loved our dogs, and our dogs loved one another. Steak and Shake was one of their regular stops for the dogs: Nothing was ever good enough for her “babies.”

We loved the weekends in Michigan. Sharon would read while Brad and I played golf. Sharon loved to read. Sometimes when she ran out of books, she would read telephone books. (Kind of strange … but she was entertained.) Then we would walk our dogs, on the beach, listen to Rod Stewart’s love songs, sip some red wine and start to cook together. As the sun would set behind the city of Chicago, we would sit outside and just enjoy the air of love and friendship. The sky was usually deep blue, light blue, gray and many shades of coral and pink. It was like heaven. In those moments, we’d always agree that this was our favorite place in the whole wide world.

We traveled to Paris, Greece, the Caribbean … just to name a few. It was the funniest thing to hear Sharon singing “Kumbaya My Lord” with her body sticking out through the roof of the limo. Rebecca, Terry, Brad and Don — we all agreed that that would not be the song that we would choose in Paris, the City of Love, and she didn’t have the voice we all wanted to hear for the second and the third time. Nevertheless, the evening was magical!

There are only two things that I wish. I wish we could have spent an hour, or a minute, or even just a few more seconds with her. I wish I could’ve taken some of her pain; she was in so much pain during the last few weeks of her life. She was a strong woman — for Sharon to complain about pain, it was unbearable to hear because she never ever complained. I wished I could’ve soaked her in an opium bath — anything that would have taken all of her pain away. Being a strong woman can be a very lonely thing. I know this because I am one. It was one of the things that we shared. When you are strong, you never talk about your problems, you don’t let anyone know that you are in pain, you never ask for help and you never want people to feel sorry for you. It can be a pretty lonely world unless you have friends who can read what’s going on with each other. We never had to ask each other for help, we just knew what the other needed and instinctively lent a hand.

It’s still a habit, but without realizing it, when I go to Whole Foods after work to pick up things for dinner, I reach out and call her number. I would grab three pieces of fish instead of two, or I would grab three pieces of desert cups without thinking … and put one down sadly. I keep picking up things that Sharon would’ve liked. She is in my mind all the time, and I often think that she is still around us. I know many of Sharon’s other friends are also having a very hard time with this. I want to call them and help all of us feel better … but what can we do? What can we say? One thing we know for sure was that she loved every single one of her friends. We are all sure of that, and it’s wonderful to know.

I guess all of Sharon’s friends will go through a process of mourning, sadness, feeling lost, anger because she left us so early, laugh because she had such a great sense of humor, cry because it is only natural, but most importantly, happiness and enlightenment because we were lucky enough to have known a woman who shared with us a long lasting, loving and a pure friendship.

For me, Sharon was my Sunday night supper, she was my new recipe, she was my righteousness, she was my glass of red wine, she was my American Idol, She was my Dancing with the Stars, she was my 1418 N. Lake Shore Dr., she was my Fairy Godfriend who I can never replace… I am contented to know that she is in Heaven with her handsome love of her life, Don, who adored her, and her dogs, Tappa and Rugby and her parents. I do hope we are as celebrated as Sharon and Don were in our last days of our lives. That would be awesome!

Lastly, I want to tell my forever best friend Sharon: “Thank you for the wonderful journey called friendship! It will be with me forever… and my heart is filled with happiness and excitement that someday, I will see you once again and we’ll hang out sipping a nice bottle of red wine and talk about the good old days on Earth”! I’ll always love you, my dear friend!!!

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